NEVER NEVER – CHUCK
We have known Chuck for a long time, from when TBB was in Belfast city centre and he was working in Pulp (proper cool little juice bar/lunch spot in Belfast now long gone/sadly missed), to listening to him DJ round Belfast. We asked Chuck for a short bio and he sent us the following through, which if you don’t know him, will give you a sense of the great character he is! He has DJ’ed and promoted along side a hell of a lot of fantastic acts over the years including Calibre, Coldcut, Benji B, Domu, Rockers Hi-Fi, Bonobo and many others.
Start the mix while reading and enjoy!
“There was a young cub up Tyrone direction who got hypnotised by a groove that was on the telly one night, ahhh bout twenty thirty odd years ago. Fuckin eejit danced in fronta thon telly for a coupla days straight. After that he dandered down the main street in Cookstown, went into the music shop and bought some vinyls (eejit didn’t even have a record player). He’d be there staring at the record imagining the music that might be on there, dancing his wee ginger head off.
After a while he met another wee ginger lad called Jazzy James who’d been hypnotised as well, but this boyo had a record player, so the two ginger eejits would dance around the turntable after school like a pair a wingnuts. If people had known what them pair a headers were up to, they’d a been locked up (probably a been for their own good). But the pair a boyo’s took the turntable & their records to a parochial hall out that direction one friday night. Well deed by fuck, next thing ya know a whole load a wingnuts landed, dancing round & round, running on the spot, arms flying all over the shop, the parish priest arrived in at one stage ta see what the fuck was going on, thought the whole thing was possessed, turned on his heels and legged it in case he caught a touch of what was going round. Strange as it sounds, that was the crack. When they weren’t at the parochial hall they’d go dancing at the teenage disco’s round the different townlands, bring their new records and eyeball the DJ till he’d play Gimme a Fat Beat or Total Confusion or some sorta mad tune, the like a which the DJ’s had never heard as they were happy to be playing nice tunes like thon blade Belinda from Carlisle.
Well I tell ya no lie, once the needle went on the record the hypnotised pimple faces would go clean berserk, temperature would near lift the roof off a place. There’s a spot down by the loughshore, wasn’t a slate left on her, no word of a lie! At the disco one night there was a DJ called JamesE, now he was an older boyo but he’d been hypnotised too and he had two record players and something called a mixer, and records that the hypnotised berserkers had never heard. Well Holy Fuck, this young cub’s head nearly blew off his shoulders, this was the shite he was waiting for and on that night he knew that that’s what he was gonna do! Next thing ya know he was playing records for the teenage berserkers of Ballymoney, Cullybecky, Lissan and further inta the back-a-beyond.
Some people were worried about the lad and rightly so. Like the hypnosis should have worn off by now, but in fact it seemed to be getting worse and to be honest the wee ginger culchie didn’t give a flying fuck. Sure the crack was mighty. He played his records for the teenage berserkers in Derry and older berserkers in Omagh. Think they used to escape from the mad house, dance their heads off and that would keep them sane for a while. His folks sent him off to college to try and settle him down a bit, but, not a hope, the groove was too strong. The funny thing was the further he went, the more berserkers he would meet. He danced around England for a coupla a years, then ended up in California and danced up and down San Francisco for a wee while with some technicolored berserkers, they were some fucking crack I tell ya! After a while he came back to Tyrone and then headed for the north coast were he played his records with the Gale Force posse, nawh it was the Force 10 posse and a lad there called The Phat Controller and he was some fucking DJ let me tell ya, so the pair a lads played their records together for a long time. In Ballycastle and Portrush and Portstewart and their favourite place of all, Rathlin Island, Oh Aye!! That berserker central. No lie. Clean off the richter scale so she was. Around that time he started playing his records with these Homespuners boyo’s up in Belfast, in a place called The Menagerie and that was a good name for thon place alright. At that time he meet berserkers from all round the country, Techno Berserkers, Hip Hopping Berserkers, FunkyReggae Berserkers, Jungle Berserkers, even Chilled Out Berserkers and Rudimentary Berserkers, there was all colour and creed of berserkers, all unified under the groove.
At this stage he was on the move to Dublin City no less where he discovered a tribe of comanche berserkers that loved the dancing as much as himself, so he stayed there and danced the legs off himself until he had to take a rest, thats what I heard anyways. I think he’s still resting the legs, but sure he’s been dancing for a good 30 years now, ya know what I mean!
But I think he pops out every once inna while to bust a groove, but sure he can’t help himself. I heard recently there that he’s gearing up to get back on the road. Playing his records and dancing his wee baldy ginger grey head off. I hope so!!
So keep an eye out for him folks, but be warned, if he’s got a turntable he could be dangerous and ya might catch a touch of it yerself! Keep an eye out for him folks but be warned, if he’s got a record player he’s dangerous!!!”